I guess my subconscious has completely accepted the fact of my youngest brother's untimely death. I say that because last night I had a dream in which his death was mentioned - by me.
In the dream I was at my mom's house, where Charlie lived. The phone rang and I answered it. A man on the other end asked to speak to Charlie. I sort of stuttered and asked him to hold on. I was going to give the phone to my mom so that she could inform the caller of Charlie's death. Why her and not me? I guess because I thought mom might actually know the person who was calling. But before I passed the phone to mom I asked who was calling. The man said he was from Brigham Young University (why? who knows?) and he was conducting a questionnaire. At that point I told him that Charlie had died in July. I don't remember the rest of the dream.
The fact of Charlie's death now showing up in my dreams makes me think that perhaps I have been dealing with accepting his death on a deeper level. But I'm not psychiatrist or psycologist or whatever, so I don't really know what it means.
In another dream last night - and here we get back to the wierdness - I dreamed about an insect that was slowly flying around in my mom's house. It was large and fragile, and a shape that I can't begin to explain. So here's a little sketch.
Yes. That's it. It was sort of a curved stick with five (or possibly seven, but I think five) insect body-shaped things attached. The middle one was, I guess, the actual insect body. And it was flying in this shape. But when we caught it and/or it was stopped on a wall, the stick part completely collapsed and hung down beneath the middle part. It was about two feet from left to right, and it was gliding slowly and gracefully through the house.
I asked my other brother, Doug, how it got in. He showed me the window screen, which was in desperate need of repair. I told him, accurately, how to repair a window screen. Someone else was there - I'm not sure who he was - who was impressed that I knew how to repair a window screen.
And that's what my dreams were about last night. Real life combined with weirdness.